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healthy relationships

When I was growing up I dreamed about falling in love, getting married and living happily ever after. I did eventually meet my prince charming, got married and then realized that the happily ever after part took a lot more work than I first thought. Don’t get me wrong, being married is wonderful, but after 18 years I’ve learned that to have a loving relationship that can weather the storms of life, you have to actually put a lot of work into it.

With Valentine’s Day right around the corner, it is a good time to think about the relationship you have or the one you hope to have someday. We have a great Learn It class coming up in February that will help teach some skills to improve your relationship.

I’m really excited for our Learn It class on Wednesday, February 7, 2018 from 7pm-8pm in the Shaw Programming Room (Room 260). Nevin G. Alderman, MA, CMHC, a relationship specialist will teach an hour-long class called Renew Love. In this class he will cover:

  • How to identify and avoid common relational pitfalls
  • Strategies to increase love, connection, and fulfillment
  • Tools for improved communication and conflict-resolution

This would be a great opportunity for a free date night!

If you can’t make it to the class, we have some great resources here in the library to help improve relationships. Here are a few of my favorite talks on CD and one audio book. Sometimes it’s nice to listen to short talks together and then be able to discuss the things you’ve learned.

AN ENDURING LOVE: FEEDING THE 7 BASIC NEEDS OF YOUR ETERNAL RELATIONSHIP
Matt Townsend
(2015)

Dr. Matt Townsend is a relationship coach and communications expert. He uses the acronym STARVED to help couples look at the seven basic needs that are vital to a healthy relationship. Most relationships are lacking in one or more of these areas, but he teaches how to feed a STARVED relationship and get back on the right path. 

FOR ALL ETERNITY: A FOUR-TALK SET TO STRENGTHEN YOUR MARRIAGE
John L. Lund
(2003)

Dr. Lund gives four different talks covering the topics of owning our words and behaviors, learning the love languages of others, conflict resolution skills, and apologies and forgiveness. These are great to listen to over and over again. The part on the different communication styles is really helpful. When you get married, you don’t always realize that the person you are married to may have come from a family that communicates very differently than you. Understanding content communication can really help a lot of relationships. 

I LOVE YOU: SIX TALKS TO STRENGTHEN YOUR MARRIAGE
John L. Lund, Douglas E. Brinley; Charles Beckert; Lucile Johnson; Bill and Chris Marshall
(2009)

This collection of six complete talks by popular LDS speakers provides proven ways to overcome many of the common challenges in marriage. 

LOVE ONE ANOTHER: A FOUR-TALK SET TO STRENGTHEN YOUR RELATIONSHIPS
John L. Lund
(2005)

In this talk set, Dr. Lund shares his knowledge on how to improve ourselves and our relationships. He uses humor and examples to make many important points. He mostly teaches to focus on the things that are within our control. 

THE SEVEN PRINCIPLES FOR MAKING MARRIAGE WORK
John M. Gottman
(2015)
Audio book available from Overdrive

John Gottman has been studying couples for years. This book shares his findings on what makes some marriages work, while others fail. Once you understand the seven principles, you can start using the strategies he shares to more effectively resolve any problem in the relationship.

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